Catch 22

Defenition of a Catch 22: an emotionally distressing dilemma in communication in which an individual receives two or more conflicting messages, in which one message negates the other. This creates a situation in which a successful response to one message results in a failed response to the other (and vice versa), so that the person will be automatically wrong regardless of response.

For example, my life is a Catch 22.

The story of my life is quite the interesting tale indeed. But hey, enough about that. Welcome to my blog, and most importantly, welcome to my mind. Every quandry of my mind is delved into in these blogs that I will write in the coming future. It's a chaotic place, and I can almost guarentee very little of it will make sense, some of it will make sense to others, and some of it will only make sense to me. But regardless, it should be something quite interesting. The only thing is, where do I begin.

A first blog post usually consists of "Hi, I'm (this person), (a whole bunch of bullshit about the person that no one cares about), thanks for reading my blog! :)". Yeah, not my forte, especially to everyone who knows me. Rather, I'd like to elaborate on some of the things that I've been thinking lately. There's a lot I've been observing that I think is really...fascinating, if that encompasses what I am trying to elaborate on. We'll see.

Lately, I've been looking for true beauty in life. What really...makes life beautiful. Every single person I ask produces a different result. Through my personal experiences, I have heard that nature makes life beautiful, that other people make life beautiful, that life even has no beauty at all. I have yet to find a concrete answer for my question. But yesterday, I think I might have found my answer.

I was riding as a passenger in a car, and at a traffic light I noticed something that really spoke to me. Two young girls (I'm assuming twins, both around 7 or 8) were walking with their mom on the sidewalk. I saw them smiling, and laughing, and the mother was so engaged in her children, the honest look in her eye really told me without words how much she has invested in her children. The two young girls showed how much the mother had done for her, and there was true happiness. All in the 18 seconds that I was at a traffic light.

This made me think for the rest of the car ride...what made that group so beautiful to look at? It makes me think of childhood memories. Everything that we feel as children. A nostalgic feeling, almost. I'm starting to believe that the beauty of life is happiness. Unity. But what brings us to find happiness? What spawns happiness? A simple question with an impossible answer. To be happy, you have to find something you enjoy. But to enjoy something, you have to be happy about it. Where does the happiness come from? A Catch 22.

Think about it.