Feeling creative!
Prom is coming up. Lots of people are being asked, many of them of which I associate myself with. It's very nice to see them being asked and having the ability to go to Prom. But it perplexes me...what is so exciting about going to Prom? I can surely say it's not the actual dance. Personally, I think school dances are some of the most pointless events...did I say they're not fun? Certainly not. From the dances I have gone to, it's a lot of fun to hang out with my friends and just lose my inhibitions for a night. But is Prom really that sad that girls just need the satisfaction of knowing that some guy notices them and asks them? Especially if they're young and immature.
Pfft. That makes me laugh.
It seems like the girls that are being asked to Prom...well, they shouldn't be there. I am a firm believer that there is a reason why Prom is for upper classmen ONLY. Because lower classmen just...can't handle Prom. They make such a huge deal out of it, "OH I'M GOING TO PROM", good for you, want a medal? Not to say they don't deserve to be excited...but really? Calm down. It's just and some guy who asked you, and for what?
However, I contradict my own theory.
My, how I wish I were an upper classman. The desire to take someone to Prom is just so heavy this year. It's not just some random girl, either. I could care less about the dance. It's just how strongly I care for them and how wonderful of an evening it would be with them. Unfortunately, age once more prohibits me from following my desires. Once more, I shall sit home the night of Prom. Is that bad? Surely not! I'll bet there's a lot of Prom Sucks parties to go to XD I'll be just fine.
Just know that if you're saving that one last dance, save it for me, dear.
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Epilogue
As the sun sets past the horizon, so does another chapter of my life.
Goodbye 15. I've reached the big one six, the sweetest of all days, my 16th birthday. But with all of these fancy names for an occasion, what is so special about such a date? 16 comes with a price. Responsibility, for one. I now burden the task of emulating adult behavior, as I am one step closer to my ultimate goal of adulthood and living a successful life. Nowadays, I feel like I am generally succeeding in this particular goal. To be a success. That is all I have been expected of as I have lived my life. You have to be perfect, Joe. You must exceed expectations.
Believe me, I hate to be a let down.
But really, I believe I have found out what I want to do with the rest of my life. Something that will fulfill my life dream of helping others. I'm thinking of being a psychiatrist, in order to become a therapist. My love for other people and helping them through tough times can be lived out in a career that drives for helping people. How absolutely beautiful. No longer will I have to live my life with the dissatisfaction that I am no longer good enough, I've just been so discouraged...but I've had a lot of influence around me.
Influence that was not present for the longest of times.
There comes a time where all of your failures and defeats suddenly fall short to one triumph that you face. Certainly, this triumph has come into my life unexpectedly, yet at the best time that it could have. It's really changed my life, and it gives me hope. It actually gave me a new definition of hope. I'm really glad I was able to get this opportunity. It's very relieving. To be honest, one of the best things that has happened to me in a while.
This really is the start of something new.
Goodbye 15. I've reached the big one six, the sweetest of all days, my 16th birthday. But with all of these fancy names for an occasion, what is so special about such a date? 16 comes with a price. Responsibility, for one. I now burden the task of emulating adult behavior, as I am one step closer to my ultimate goal of adulthood and living a successful life. Nowadays, I feel like I am generally succeeding in this particular goal. To be a success. That is all I have been expected of as I have lived my life. You have to be perfect, Joe. You must exceed expectations.
Believe me, I hate to be a let down.
But really, I believe I have found out what I want to do with the rest of my life. Something that will fulfill my life dream of helping others. I'm thinking of being a psychiatrist, in order to become a therapist. My love for other people and helping them through tough times can be lived out in a career that drives for helping people. How absolutely beautiful. No longer will I have to live my life with the dissatisfaction that I am no longer good enough, I've just been so discouraged...but I've had a lot of influence around me.
Influence that was not present for the longest of times.
There comes a time where all of your failures and defeats suddenly fall short to one triumph that you face. Certainly, this triumph has come into my life unexpectedly, yet at the best time that it could have. It's really changed my life, and it gives me hope. It actually gave me a new definition of hope. I'm really glad I was able to get this opportunity. It's very relieving. To be honest, one of the best things that has happened to me in a while.
This really is the start of something new.
Thursday, April 05, 2012
An Endless Circle
One thought constitues another entire realm of thought. This is how things are now.
Running away from something that is already ahead of me. Running. All I want to do is stop. Face the music. Why can I not? Because I fear the road ahead, although I sprint down the road blind, disregarding all I run into. It's a cycle that none can escape. Running in circles. The worst feeling you can ever feel...going nowhere. Lately, it seems that is just what I have done. Gone nowhere. Backwards, even. When I try to seek refuge, I am merely hunted down by fate's ugly fortune and forced to seek shelter elsewhere. The truth is - there is no shelter. Where could you go? Who is to be trusted? No one is to say for sure.
What I'd do for a hint.
Fortune has not treated me too kindly. An opportunity held so dear, slipping away from your very fingertips. To feel the smooth surface grace your skin and then to be ripped away like the strings of one's heart. Yet again, a terrible feeling to feel. But yet, I still remain happy. Haha, emotions. They seem to always get the best of me. Contradicting everything I say with another figment of my brain that flutters away to another thought, and makes me feel better or worse about a situation. I don't understand why I do this...but I surely do.
I'm a stranger to myself.
But I know things will become better. They always do. Something comes around and enchants every aspect of my life until I have nothing to complain about. That is the picture perfect image; however as we all know nothing can achieve perfection. Yet this is what I shall still stride for, regardless of its impossible nature. I can predict what happens next, also. Call me a prophet, but I've seen it all too many times. I'll encounter disappointment, cower at its force, and crumble like the ruins of a battlefield. Wash, rinse, repeat. It's a cycle. A circle.
An endless circle, in which no one can form sides out of.
Running away from something that is already ahead of me. Running. All I want to do is stop. Face the music. Why can I not? Because I fear the road ahead, although I sprint down the road blind, disregarding all I run into. It's a cycle that none can escape. Running in circles. The worst feeling you can ever feel...going nowhere. Lately, it seems that is just what I have done. Gone nowhere. Backwards, even. When I try to seek refuge, I am merely hunted down by fate's ugly fortune and forced to seek shelter elsewhere. The truth is - there is no shelter. Where could you go? Who is to be trusted? No one is to say for sure.
What I'd do for a hint.
Fortune has not treated me too kindly. An opportunity held so dear, slipping away from your very fingertips. To feel the smooth surface grace your skin and then to be ripped away like the strings of one's heart. Yet again, a terrible feeling to feel. But yet, I still remain happy. Haha, emotions. They seem to always get the best of me. Contradicting everything I say with another figment of my brain that flutters away to another thought, and makes me feel better or worse about a situation. I don't understand why I do this...but I surely do.
I'm a stranger to myself.
But I know things will become better. They always do. Something comes around and enchants every aspect of my life until I have nothing to complain about. That is the picture perfect image; however as we all know nothing can achieve perfection. Yet this is what I shall still stride for, regardless of its impossible nature. I can predict what happens next, also. Call me a prophet, but I've seen it all too many times. I'll encounter disappointment, cower at its force, and crumble like the ruins of a battlefield. Wash, rinse, repeat. It's a cycle. A circle.
An endless circle, in which no one can form sides out of.
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